User Profile

My life on this planet thus far has been rather uneventful. I was born in Modesto, but grew up in a redneck town called Placerville where I attended a private SDA school. For 9 years of my life. It wasn't until I moved to Stockton and was introduced to computers and the internet and new friends did I start really learning. I’m still learning, and have a lot to learn before I can truly say that I’ve done all I could do, but still failed. Years ago I was a tremendous geek. I made websites, played counter-strike and magic: the gathering. Life was terribly good until I realized that this wasn't what I wanted. In the middle of high school I started becoming much more social, making friends, and I personally believe I ended up with the best group of friends ever. I thank God for this. All of them have inspired me in one way or another and they continue to inspire me. I believe I’m on my final few years before I’m complete. A content, happy person. I’ve thought of many things that I could do with my life, and I have many jobs to fall back on if what I am working on now doesn't work out. But I believe that it will work out. Film is where my heart is set. My dream, to become a director of movies that not all will enjoy, but there will be the group of fans who have similar taste in very contemporary surrealist movies. But at the least, I would like to work for the movie industry. Doing something. But first, I need to make screenwriting a hobby, then an everyday habit. Writing, reading, researching, remembering. I’m a procrastinator, which is one of the things I’m working on. Someday, hopefully in the very near future, I will have fixed problems and have created good habits, and I will start living my "dream." Pray for my lost soul. Of course, if I meet someone whom I fall in love with, wherever she goes, I'll follow and find something I like doing with her, because I am lost without "her."

Morrissey - I Have Forgiven Jesus
why did you give me /so much desire?
when there is nowhere I can go
to offload this desire?
and why did you give me so much love
in a loveless world?
when there is no one I can turn to
to unlock all this love
and why did you stick me in
self-deprecating bones and skin
Jesus-do you hate me?
why did you stick me in
self-deprecating bones and skin
… … do you hate me?"